I recently watched It’s a Wonderful Life with my wife, at the end of which Jimmy Stewart and all sing the holiday classic, Auld Lang Syne. It struck me that I wasn’t sure of the actual meaning of the phrase. Turns out to be of Scottish origin, roughly meaning “days long ago,” or even “the good old days.” It’s a phrase that will seldom be applied to the year 2020.
That said, this go around the sun did have its moments, from astonishing advances in medical technology and major political turnabouts, to getting to spend more time with your family, provided you a.) already lived with them and b.) like them enough to see this as a positive.
Whatever the hell transpired this year, one of the oddest parts is that we all went through it together. Not only is that terrible for so many reasons, but it also means it’s really hard to write about because, well, you were there too.
So, skipping any grand summary, I’ll just say that I’m thankful that my family and I are still on our feet and have thus far remained healthy. I hope you can say the same and I’m terribly sorry if you cannot.
Given this is my blog, I should also probably tell you what I’ve been up to all this time. Long story short, aside from a few shoots, I basically took the year off from working and focused on raising my son, who, when the world suddenly screeched to a halt, had just turned 1. With photography jobs at first impossible to find and then few and far between, I decided to skip the hassle of hustling for scraps and simply put down the camera for a while in order to spend my time watching after him. This also solved a childcare dilemma and helped my wife to focus on her job, which she has been fortunate to be able to continue doing from home. In that way, this turned into an exceptionally special year, with both of us home full time getting to spend way more time together as a family than any working parent could normally expect.
Taking time off was weird. I’ve been shooting professionally for over 15 years now and never once thought of doing that. Although early on there were certainly periods where time off was practically all I had. This was the first time, however, that I could do it and not be stressed out not knowing when the next job was coming. For a while, that was amazing. My life revolved around hanging out with my kid, walking the dog and working on projects around the house during naps and on weekends. I painted the house, xeriscaped the front yard, redid the bathroom… I got a lot done! As time went on though it became more difficult, as the anxiety of not being creative crept in to fill the void of the stresses that come with working. Finally, later in the year, I decided to put together an idea that had been ruminating in my mind and set up a small studio space in my garage. The project took some time to get going, but I finally started shooting again and am looking forward to having some fresh work to show early next year.
Also, around the same time, despite the pandemic reaching all time highs, the phone started ringing again. Well, it was emails, but there’s no saying for that. So, I was able to squeeze in a few legit assignments before year’s end. It felt great to be productive again and was also reassuring to reaffirm that I truly love what I do for a living. With so much time off, you have time to think – perhaps too much – about what other career paths you might have taken or might consider taking in the future. I certainly had some ideas, and to a degree am pursuing them to see where they might lead. After all, who knows what the world and the photo industry will be like on the other side of this great, historical chasm? But shooting again has reaffirmed that even if I were to expand on what I do, as long as the opportunity to shoot professionally still exists I will want to keep doing it.
2021 will undoubtedly be an off year again compared to previous norms, but it has to be better than 2020, right!? God, I hope so. Even with the pandemic reaching horrific new heights and still a long way to go before things turn around, there is hope on the horizon. Whatever next year brings for me and for the rest of you, I hope it is at least somewhat better and we can all start getting back to some semblance of the life we remember. At a minimum, there’s a solid chance we’ll get to be around other people, which, for the most part, is a good thing.
As for me, I will at least miss this special window of time where it was just my wife and I, focusing on each other and watching our boy transform from a babbling baby just learning to walk to one who’s running down the sidewalk and amazing us with his daily, newfound abilities. In that way – and only in that way – maybe these were the good old days. I hope there was something about this year that was special in its own way for you, even if everything else was shit. As for that shit, time to leave this garbage year in the rearview window.
Happy Holidays, Happy New Year and get bent 2020!